#LiveInYourSeason

Quiet dinners are where my soul is recharged and renewed. Keep your clubs and pubs…quiet, intimate, “get to know me” and “lets build each other” type of conversation is what my heart always skips to. So when my best friend invited me for dinner, my soul was already expectant of the awesomeness that was about to unfold. Little did I know how profound an impact on my soul the conversation would have!

The conversation started off as a catch-up exercise. Questions like “how are you” and “dude, it has been so long, what have you been up to” were served as the appetizer that night. It delighted my soul that my friend was keeping well, keeping strong in the faith and was really doing well in her career. Because we had not seen each other in a while, the appetizer portion of our conversation went on for a good hour, we laughed hard, almost in appreciation of the quality of the plate that was presented before us (we were glad to be in a place where everyone seemed to be having “starters” in their individual conversations as the room was full of hearty laughs – my laugh is known to get us stares and near evictions from eateries).

Once we had caught up, we decided that a semi-serious pallet cleanser was in order just before we get ourselves stuck into the “meat” of the conversation. The topic moved to a recent meeting I had with an ex and how the events of that day brought clarity to my soul.

After detailing the events of that day, my friend asked me how I was doing following the end of the relationship and the answer I had completely set my soul at peace about events that followed the break-up. “I have never been happier” was my answer to her question and immediately I felt I needed to qualify this statement so that I would not come across as a heartless man who moves on too quick or simply doesn’t care for that person anymore. This is how I explained it to my friend: I feel like I am happy now because I am getting to really know who I am…for me! What interests me? What type of movies do I really like? What kind of a woman am I really interested in? Am I an indoor or outdoor person? Do I really like ice cream? Do I want to get married…EVER? What do I think about cross-cultural relationships? Do I want children? How many children do I want? What language will they speak? Do I want to play Jacaranda FM in my car or do I want to blast my massive hip-hop collection to the max? I am happy because I am finally (without the pressures of someone who knew who they are and what they want) getting to understand what makes me happy.

My friend then offered the mains for that night in one simple statement…”it is your season…” This immediately resonated in my soul as if I was looking for that exact phrase all along to quantify what this phase of my life was for me! It is my season and I am meant to live it to the full because answering those questions about all the silly things that made me the imperfect mate so that one day…when the season of becoming someone’s mate comes around…I am able to answer all those questions with certainty and conviction.

So I am living my season. I am actively pursing all things that make me happy and discovering those that do not make me happy. I am defining new boundaries that I believe in. Not my girlfriend…not my parents…not my church…I am living in this season to fully discover all that God has hidden within me! People often look at me with sadness when I tell them about the end of the relationship Iso cherished. Sadness should never be the emotion we feel when entering into a new season. Expectation should be the overriding feeling. We should be expecting to wear new clothes, start new habits, dine at new places…just redefine how the world knows us and relates to us.

So to all my brothers and sisters…this here was my “take-away” from that night. live in your season. No matter which season you are in. Whether it be a season of financial prosperity or financial lack; blossoming relationships or ones that have just ended; academic success or failure…live in your season because it is within that season that God prepares us for the next season in our lives.

From an incredibly happy brother redefining all his emotions, ambitions, preferences and characteristics in this season of his life…and loving it…I bless God for friends who reveal greatness from within us! Blessed rest of the year ahead.

#LiveInYourSeason 

The Africa I dream of...

I often sit in awe of the amount of aid that comes Africa's way. Like the orphan of the world, handouts are often given to this sleeping continent not because the world wants to, but because of some moral obligation towards a continent abused for centuries. Like an orphan, lady Africa continues to take “aid” without discrimination as her need to survive far outweighs the need to sustainably remove herself from the vicious cycle of take and beg for more.

I, for one, dream of an Africa too proud to perpetuate the cycle of hand-to-mouth survival. I dream of an Africa whose bountiful resources are allocated amongst her children as wisely as the many mothers of the continent to their offspring on a daily basis. I dream of an Africa where those in power rule over the continent as a family that works together to better itself, where brother lifts up brother and sister hides the shortcomings of another sister. I dream of an Africa prosperous for all her people. An Africa where our girls are protected and our boys nurtured to become the very protectors. I dream of an all-inclusive Africa, where religion, race, culture and sexual orientation differences are acknowledged only as a measure of how unique we all are in the eyes of the Lord.

My Africa is far from perfect.

In fact, the religious intolerance in Nigeria, the continued rape of women in South Africa, the incapacity of the African Union to lead a united African agenda, the ever increasing presence of terrorism, significant levels of government corruption and the instances of misappropriation of aid meant for the poorest highlight just how imperfect my Africa is.

In spite of this, I hold on to "the Africa I dream of"…not because I am naïve, but because I am part of the greater generation that needs to work towards the realization of this dream. Our generation is given the opportunity to move towards this goal every day. Whether it be in the functions we perform at church, the kind gestures we make towards those who are different and those who do not know us, the mentoring of a young man who would otherwise not have a positive role model, in the rebuttal of and correction of my xenophobic brothers and sisters’ way of thinking or taking up an active role in government…we are given the chance to shape our Africa every day.

I choose to get involved because the Africa I dream of is the inheritance I would like to leave unto the generations to come. It’s time we as a people stopped being social media activists and rise up to the challenges we are faced. It’s time we stop being religious criers of empty prayers without action. Rise up young generation. Get involved. Actively shape lady Africa into the abundant and bountiful place she has the potential to become. This is the legacy our generation should leave for the coming generation.

Here I am, send me…let my soul and spirit be agitated to bring the Africa I dream of to reality!